We’re all attracted to warm people, people who make us feel special. I think part of the reason warmness has such a profound effect on us is because, for the majority of us, on any given day, we are faced with more people who don’t care than people who do. This is the brilliance of How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie sought to change the world by giving us an understanding many of us weren’t born with. It was one of my first introductions to thinking outside of just my own self interest. We all want people to provide us with understanding and genuine interest.
We can even find ourselves stuck in situations where months have gone by without anyone expressing appreciation for us. We can liken it to being dehydrated in the desert: seeing the water evokes a strong reaction from us. We have to have it; it fulfills a basic need. Love is important.
So what we’re looking for at any given time is people who care. This is a solid building block for everything else to be built around.